Whether you’ve worked in one, regularly shop in one, or have never even set foot in your SU, you’ll all know at least one of these people.

Whether for good or for bad, each one of these customers will have graced your life at some point during uni. It could have been a one-time encounter, they may be your best friend, or it might even be you...

1. The Stressed Library-Goer

They're in and out of the shop all day, always carrying a stack of books and in a hurry - typically buys coffee, meal deals, coffee, snacks, coffee, energy drinks, and coffee… Is also occasionally sent on the lunch run and finds the whole ordeal VERY stressful.

Source: Giphy

2. That one REALLY Rich Kid

Spends about £15 a day solely on lunch and doesn’t care if it’s not on the meal deal, all their clothes are branded, and they will be putting it on Daddy’s credit card.

Source: Giphy

3. The confused international/Erasmus student

Endearingly misunderstands which coin is which (don’t worry - I’ve been there) and usually pays with a £50 note or tries to use old pound-coins. Knows exactly how to sniff out the one product from their home country and is always so grateful that it’s sold there.

Source: Giphy

4. The Eco Warrior

Angry about single-use plastics and enthusiastic about alternatives (often also vegan). Doesn’t want a receipt because of paper waste.

Source: Giphy

5. The Early Riser

Gets to the shop before the daily sandwich order, energetic and ready to go to the library/classes WAY before everyone else. Annoying because they do life better than you.

Source: Giphy

6. The Society Dogsbody

Comes in around 6/7pm loaded with all sorts of weird and wonderful equipment. Typically buys ridiculous amounts of biscuits, sharing packs of crisps, teabags and hot chocolate. Wants a receipt so they can claim the money back.

Source: Giphy

7. The Disorganised Exam Student

Comes in just before closing wanting to buy a calculator/multiple pens, and always feels the need to go on about how they have an exam at 9am tomorrow, laughing loudly about how disorganised they are.

Source: Giphy

8. The Graduate

Greets you with “I haven’t been here since 1986” and proceeds to tell you their life story, reminiscing about the old times and rambling about how different the uni looks now.

Source: Giphy

9. The Professor

Rarely seen, very out of place in the SU, and outwardly uncomfortable - tends to buy stationery and leave as briskly as possible.

Source: Giphy

10. The Sportsman

Comes in the evening stinking of BO, always buys protein bars and bananas.

Source: Giphy

11. The Budget Buyer

Can be found rummaging through the reduced section and only ever spends about 20p. Asks for unnecessary discounts/ free stuff that they know they won’t get.

Source: Giphy

Which customer are you?
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