Two chocoholics lock horns and discuss their top 5 chocolate bars, whilst also casting judgement over each other’s.

So many choices, but who wins your vote in this eternal debate over the best chocolate bars!? Scroll through the options and responses and then submit your winner through the interactive poll. Only the best can triumph!

Jeremy’s Top 5:

  1. Milky bar

Cocoa-nuts amongst yourselves will call me out on this choice and say ‘White chocolate isn’t technically chocolate, blah blah blah’. Others might sneer and say I’m a child for still liking these. But you know what? I don’t care what you think Sonny Jim and I’ll have these over your ‘mature’ Lindt chocolate any day of the week. White chocolate is bangin’, and Milky Bars are no exception. I could eat around 10 of these in a row without hesitation and time after time, enjoy that milky taste melt in my mouth. Sweet, light, and with the nice touch of imprinting the Milky Bar kid and his donkey on the chocolate bar itself; this is hands-down my all-time favourite.

 

2. Crunchie

In this chocolate pairing, it’s actually the honeycomb centre that wears the trousers in this marriage. The chocolate covering the bar is relatively thin, and it’s complemented perfectly by the sweet honeycomb centre that has managed to pull off the right texture and toughness. It’s not too hard to ward off grannie’s eating it, and it’s not too soft so that it resembles some sort of lava-cake goo (having said that, that sounds pretty good). It’s just right. The honeycomb crumbles and dissolves easily in the mouth and the sweet toffee and caramel tones hits your tastebuds like an uppercut from Mike Tyson (OK that was a poor analogy and probably overly exaggerated, but you get what I mean).

 

3. Twix

Twix doesn’t shout out amongst it’s other shiny foiled neighbours in the sweets aisle; think of it as the quiet backbencher MP in the House of Commons on a sleepy, Tuesday lunchtime. Unlike other bars, Twix needs no gimmicks and razzma tazz in their marketing e.g. shouting like a lout about it’s masculine ego (yes, I’m talking about you Yorkie). It’s all about its wonderful proportions of chocolate, caramel and biscuit. A single bite will give you a firm but crumbly biscuit base, and you pull away to find streams of caramel and chocolate coming together perfectly.

 

4. Reese’s peanut buttercups

I had to include this chocolate from our cousins from across the pond (I know, I know American chocolates). Don’t get me wrong, there’s no doubt in my mind that Hershey’s and co. are awful chocolate bars, but Reese’s peanut buttercups are the best of a bad bunch. It’s a simple but effective mix: a milk chocolate cup filled with a slightly crumbly, dense peanut butter with a smidge of a salty kick. It’s great if you love the peanut butter-chocolate combo and if you’re one of those fools that don’t love that combo, the only thing I can think of is that you’re allergic to nuts. That’s the only legit reason that washes with me, so if that isn’t the reason, that’s really gonna rustle my jimmies.

 

5. Kit Kat chunky

With it’s clever advertising, the Kit Kat brand has entered popular culture as the go to chocolate for your morning brew. But the product also stands up to the test. Kit Kat chunkies are durable enough for dunking into a hot beverage, and the chocolate doesn’t melt away so you’re just biting away into the wafer biscuit. I have heard of other Kit Kat fans actually preferring to suck the chocolate off first, and then eat the wafer biscuit separately. What. A. Ridiculous. Idea. Why?! Bloody heathens. 

 

Ashlea’s Top 5:

 

  1. Picnic

Nuts, caramel, raisins and milk chocolate. Not my usual go-to I must say. My brother actually got this for me when I was younger and I’d never tried one before. Out of gratitude I felt that I obviously had to try it and let me tell you, it positively changed my life for the better. I can quite honestly say that these ingredients make the best classic chocolate bar! The flavours and textures combine to bring you -in my eyes (or mouth?)-complete and total perfection.

 

  1. Dairy Milk Mint

These bad boys used to be my all time favourite. Coming from a choco-addict, that is definitely saying something. Back in the day (because being 22 is now old!) they used to have crispy clusters of green mint within the deliciously rich cadbury milk chocolate. I swear, I am not making it up. They were BEAUTIFUL, like something that had fallen from heaven itself. Every time I ate it, I swear I could hear the angels sing but then, maybe that was just my overactive imagination. That is genuinely what my tastebuds felt like though! You could suck and crunch, it had all of the ideals! However, they have recently changed these and made them a bit more like Aero so that the chocolate is mint flavoured. It is still nice but it is by no means the same.

 

  1. Bounty

I most commonly demolish one of these when the weather is at it’s absolute worst because it makes me feel tropical, like the summer is not too far into the distant future because of the creamy coconuty-ness. I think I also like these because I make it a challenge every time I eat it where I take all of the chocolate off and then eat the coconut. It’s quite fun but I get some rather disapproving looks. But hey, that’s how I enjoy it!

 

  1. Crunch White

This bar is for when I need a serious sugar pick-me-up. Trust me when I say that it sorts you right out but also believe that the taste and the texture is utterly glorious. I am a tad biased as I do really enjoy white chocolate (she says while giving Jeremy evils because he chose Milkybar first) but the light crispy-ness of the rice krispies inside add to the sweetness of the bar. Tip: eat it at room temperature or warm because it means that you can make it melt in your mouth easily and can also really feel that CRUNCH.

 

  1. Timeout

Who would have thought that you could put light, flakey and crispy all in the same chocolate bar? Well with a wafer bottom, a flakey centre and a smooth finish - Timeout did it. They are the champions of subtle blends! The only problem is that they are incredibly addictive because they are so light! I will not admit to how many I have eaten in a row but just think, if I wasn’t ashamed of myself I would proudly admit the amount online… I like to think I have a separate stomach for desserts anyway - chocolate included!

 

The verdict: who has the better selection?

Jeremy: I think my top 5 trump over Ashlea’s any day of the week. I would say her selection is more obscure and has more ‘marmite’ choices. I mean, come on, Bounty?! No one wants that grit-like coconut texture nowhere near their chops, let alone in their chocolate. That’s why whenever anyone opens a celebrations, they’re always the last to go. Dairy Milk Mint? There’s a reason why they were discontinued in the first place. And don’t get me started on the eyesore of a font that is ‘Time Out’. Overall, I’d give her selection a 4/10.

Ashlea: Rude. What makes you say that? It’s good to be adventurous! How many of mine have you actually tried? I have to say, yours are all a bit too simple for me. I eat so much chocolate that I like to mix it up a bit and try new things. This spontaneity has led me to enjoy the finer things in life - like a word-class taste palette. Milkybar, yes. Crunchie, yes. Kitkat and Twix - I mean, seriously?! Could you BE anymore stereotypical? I rate your selection 6/10 due to the lack of range and texture.

 

 

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