Nine problems you only understand if you go to a London uni

Sofie Penn-Slater on 9 February 2017
The view of the River Thames from the Shard

Being a student at a London University: You never realised studying in the Big Smoke would be so... expensive.

The mixed blessing of night buses and the night tube

A graphic of Londoners on the night tube

You’re drunk, cold and sleepy after a night out on the other side of London - but the capital’s night-time transport system has come to the rescue! Unfortunately, the warm soporific environment mean’s it quite likely you’ll fall asleep and end up somewhere really obscure, like Morden or Loughton. Ugh.

Tube strikes

London’s amazing transport system works an absolute dream - until you have to get to an important exam. At this point, a union will announce industrial action and the whole network will grind to a halt, leaving you panicked and desperately trying to get your hands on the last boris bike in the stand.

Rent prices

OH MY GOD THE RENT PRICES! Unfortunately, you’ll pay about £150 for a tiny room with a 90% chance of mice, whilst your mates up north pay £60 for a comparatively palatial pad. How annoying.

Beer prices

A GIF of a man desperately reaching for a pint of beer, like a thirsty student at a London university

OH MY GOD THE BEER PRICES! Birmingham students apparently spend £4.12 a week on alcohol - in London you’ll be lucky to get a pint of warm Heineken for less than £7.

Real people with real jobs

Living in a student town definitely has it’s upsides - the general population are used to seeing drunk, hungover or stressed students pottering about for two-thirds of the year, and are relatively nice to them. In London, students are treated with the same contempt as tourists, especially by fancy city types who don’t appreciate it when you’re sick in the clear bin bags on the Tube platform.

Distracting museums

Haha! A good thing about studying in London! We have free museums coming out of our ears, from the Tate Modern to the Design Museum, the National Gallery to the National Portrait Gallery. Unfortunately, it’s easy to kid yourself that spending a whole weekday wandering around the V&A is educational when actually it is procrastination and you should be in the library.

Zone what?

There are lots of different universities in London, and you’ll probably have a fair few friends that study at them. But it’s easy to forget that London is HUGE and trying to actually see your friends that also live “in London” can mean embarking on an epic trek that takes you on the Overground, a DLR train and three tube lines.

Urban foxes

A GIF of urban foxes that will haunt you during your time at a London university

Seriously, urban wildlife is awesome, but urban foxes can be a bit frustrating. They’ll have sex loudly outside your window in the middle of the night, leave poops everywhere and scatter rubbish all over your front grass. A bit like that one housemate you hate.

South of the river

Actually, ‘South of the river’ is a mythical invention created by the government as a massive social experiment. A bit like Southern Rail. London actually finishes at Borough Market, and anyone that tries to tell you otherwise is just part of the conspiracy cover-up.

Did you go to a London University? Are you there now? Are you hoping to head to the Big Smoke to study? Check out our guide to having fun in London on a student budget.

Sofie Penn-Slater
Sofie Penn-Slater on 9 February 2017